Stress-free Weddings: Four Ways to Deal with a Difficult Bridesmaid

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Brides.maid

Noun

  • A woman who is like a sister, a friend in every way, and a special person that is asked to share in the bride’s big day.
  • A special person asked to share in the bride’s big day

 

In an ideal scenario, your bridesmaids should be the all-girl ensemble that would help you prepare for your wedding in whatever aspect possible. Unfortunately, you cannot count on everyone to have the same positive attitude as you do. Much like any other wedding, there is, you will inevitably have a handful of difficult bridesmaids in your entourage. They could either be show stealers or perpetual gripers that would always seem to get on your very last nerve. Oftentimes, they can put a pall on what would have been an exciting time and very often, they can disappoint you with their bad attitudes or just their rudeness in general. In extreme cases, when your bridesmaid and you fail to see eye to eye, you might even run the risk of losing their friendship forever. However, there is a myriad of ways to avoid creating a maid-zilla. Although you cannot leverage your bridesmaids’ behaviors, doing these strategies would ensure that they would be easier to deal with and would keep them happy.

So, before you send out that invitation to your bridesmaid and have them grace your wedding venue at the Glass Garden or elsewhere, be sure to keep these techniques in mind:

 

Do not overwhelm your bridesmaids with costs

While you can reasonably expect your bridesmaids to support you on your big day, you cannot expect them to be as receptive to costs. Sure, they can be happy and be excited for you but if they have to continuously spend for every little thing you ask of them, you are creating an avenue for them to resent you. Remember, at the end of the day, it is still your wedding and while it is considered an honor for most individuals to be bridesmaids, they do not exactly want to shoulder some costs—particularly if they are operating in a tight budget. Ideally, the bride should be able to shoulder a bridesmaid’s hair and makeup, dress and the shoes (if you wish them to match).

 

Be reasonable about your wedding-related requirements

One way of keeping bad attitudes in check is to be realistic about what you expect your bridesmaids to do for you. In this regard, you should be frank and candid to them as to how much time you wish they would devote to you before your actual wedding day. Do not be overly demanding of their time. Remember, while you may be too wrapped up about your wedding, your bridesmaids still have a life outside of it and have other priorities to run. A reasonable requirement for your bridesmaids is to ask them to attend the dress fitting, your bridal shower, rehearsal dinner and a couple of night’s stay at a hotel. If there are other favors you wish to ask of them such as planning duties and the like, feel free to ask them but ensure that your wedding-related tasks would not eat up too much of their personal time.

 

Check if you are not being a bridezilla yourself

Before you start accusing any of your bridesmaids of being a diva, be sure to keep yourself in check as well. In most cases, brides can become very demanding of their entourage as they become more and more stressed about the wedding day. More often than not, brides would not even realize it until it is pointed out to them. So, before you start pointing fingers, stop and reassess how you have been acting lately. Have you been snippy? Do you have any demands that seem unreasonable? You may be all too wrapped up in your wedding, but remember, your bridesmaids may promise to support you, but they have never promised to become as emotionally invested (and involved) in the wedding as you are. Keep yourself in check and see if your behavior might be the cause why your bridesmaids are acting out.

 

Speak out in the face of diva-dom

If you have done everything that you can to ensure that your bridesmaids are happy by giving them an affordable, fun and exciting bridesmaid experience, then the problem might not be you, but them. If you think a particular bridesmaid of yours’ attitude is inexcusable, speak up. Address the situation right away, yourself as this is not a task that you can delegate to others. Do not ask your maid of honor to play mediator as this can only aggravate the problem. Let the errant bridesmaid know how you feel and let it come from you. The message conveyed will have more weight if it came from you. Furthermore, you should be mature enough to speak up for yourself and not have others speak for on your behalf.

 

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