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Weddings Sins That Will Make Your Lola Gasp

It’s 2017, and it seems we forgot our values and traditions of weddings. Millenials have embraced the liberated culture of the West and have forgotten local traditions that are unique to Filipino culture. Thus, you may be guilty of committing wedding sins even when you aren’t aware. 

Read on to find which of the forgotten traditions will save your Lola from the heartache even if you are getting married in Intramuros – Casa Manila style.

 

Placing The Groom’s Name Before the Bride in Invitations

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The bride and her parents’ name should be written first. They are the host and share a large portion of the expenses. 

Your Lola and titas will agree to this because they’ve been through it. They definitely understand the delegation of responsibilities. Therefore it is tradition to have hers before the groom’s and his parents’ name on the invitations.

Thank you letters should print the groom’s name and his family before the bride’s name to show their support and acceptance to the ceremony and its proceedings.

 

The Bride Coming Before the Groom

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Ladies come first, but this isn’t one of those times. It’s bad luck for the groom to arrive after the bride. This is a grave sin for both couples, so be wary on your big day. 

Coordinate with each party and find a way to communicate if your partner is on his or her way. Be mindful of the time during preparation. Oversee any hindrance that may come along the way, be it traffic jam, a car breaking down, weather changes, broken zipper, lost pair of shoe or worse, a lost wedding ring.

 

 

The Bride Wearing a Pearl Jewelry

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It’s not pearl but look at what happened to Ariel because of the necklace.

As much as possible, pearl fanatics are discouraged from donning their prized accessories. Pearls resemble teardrops, and it is said that wearing pearl accessories will bring you tears. Unfortunately, they aren’t tears of joy.

Avoid wearing a string of pearls or pearl earrings on your wedding day. Doing so will bring sorrow and tears to your married life. Spare yourself and your future family from despair by following the tradition. Don’t come running to abuela, we warned you.

Like all events, there’s proper etiquette for guests. This case, the proper decorum also stems from our culture and traditions. Read this in case you get invited to someone’s big day.

 

Giving Sharp Objects as Gifts

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Give appropriate gifts. Remember when she thought forks were used for combing hair?

It may be tempting to give a set of knives to your BFF chef getting hitched this weekend, but doing so will bring bad luck. 

Sharp objects like scissors and gardening tools are home essentials, but there are other home necessities like appliances, pieces of furniture and home décor that are better given as presents to the newlyweds. They will greatly appreciate the gesture even if it’s not in the registry.

Giving a set of knives is also creepy, don’t you think?

 

Dress Code

The bride should be the most beautiful woman on her day. The groom is the most handsome man in the room. Not you nor your date

A wedding is a formal event, so dress accordingly. Some weddings have a theme indicated on the invite. Hence, respect the couple’s wishes what attire should be worn.

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Avoid stealing the spotlight and earning an eyeful from the elders by wearing skimpy dresses. Opt for modest clothing options. Don’t wear revealing, skin-tight dresses or short-sleeved casual attire. Polish your black shoes and style your hair to look clean and presentable. The guests’ appearance reflects the bride’s or the groom’s personality and any undesirable traits will reflect negatively to the in-laws.

 

Party Pooping

A wedding is also a celebration – feast of life, love, and unity. Don’t be a spoil sport by refusing to partake in the games and festivities. You’ll be putting down the energy and the mood of the couple. The goal is to attract positive and boundless energy for them. Do not be the cause to negate them.

These are some of the customs and traditions that are not observed by couples during their matrimonial rites. Guests also have to look out for these practices and make sure they follow the practices when gracing the event with their presence. If you want a refresher on other practices that are a must, head on to Casa Manila Museum. It features the lifestyle of elite Filipinos, who were conscious of social etiquettes and graces. It’s great place be purified and instill the traditions in yourself. Lola will be so proud.

Weddings 101: Five Things Your Wedding Guests Don’t Care About

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“A gloomy guest fits not a wedding feast” –Friedrich Schiller
Wedding planning can be incredibly stressful—there are just a lot of things to take into consideration. A good wedding package in the Philippines, the wedding venue, the catering, the wedding decorations—these are just a fraction of what wedding planning truly is in its entirety. Another thing that would add to the list of what you have to consider is how receptive your guests will be to some aspects in your wedding. While this is an excellent mindset for couples who want to commemorate a joyous event with their guests’ best interests at heart, you would be surprised to find that there are a lot of things that guests do not really care about. Perhaps if you knew what these things were, you would not be as keen and meticulous in executing them well and devote more of your time to planning the other aspects of your wedding. Furthermore, if you worried less about this stuff, then you can take away a bit of what is stressing you out.

Here are just a few things your guests do not care about and you probably should not spend a lot of time fussing over:

  1. Wedding Invitations

In this digital age, more and more couples are opting to go paperless when it comes to their wedding invitations. Not only is it nature-friendly and green, but it is economic and practical as well and yet, a lot of couples have this staunch belief that their invitations should be an elaborate presentation of what their wedding guests can expect. While it might be a brief prelude and introduction of what your guests can expect, it barely makes an impression and would likely end up in the waste bin after your wedding.

  1. The Guest Book

Most guests cannot really be bothered to just jot down their names on a huge guest book just to confirm they have indeed attended your wedding. So, instead of having them sign something that is akin to a roll call once they are done, incorporate a little creativity on what would have been a dull book. Plaster your photo on a large piece of paper and have guests write their wedding wishes for you on it. You can then have it framed after the wedding and you and your spouse can have a grand time reading about what your guests wish for you.

  1. The Flowers

Flowers are an important aspect and beautiful floral arrangements are always a welcome addition to your chosen wedding venue. Flowers are also a way of incorporating your personal style into a space. However, there is such a thing as floral arrangements being too extravagant. Those exorbitantly priced golden roses might look stunning, but it is hardly practical and not one of your guests would probably look back on your wedding day and remember the ostentatious display of floral wreaths. Your guests will appreciate the floral arrangements you have chosen—regardless of how much you have spent for them.

  1. The Dress

While this is more for yourself than your guests, there is really no practical reason to blow your bridal budget on a fancy dress that you are going to wear just once and never again. You can look just as stunning in a more affordable gown provided you know how to carry yourself in it. After all, it is not always about the price of the gown but rather how you bring yourself confidently in it. So, even if your wedding gown is sans the designer label, your guests are still sure to think you are a beautiful bride.

  1. The Cake

Wedding cakes are excellent, but apart from using it for the cake-slicing portion of the program there is really not much use for it as most couples opt to serve a different cake to their guests. While towering and meticulously detailed wedding cakes make for a great addition to your wedding reception, your guests would not miss it. Instead, you can opt to have a cake that is within your budget and which tastes great as well—and one you can serve to your guests as well.

 

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Wedding Food 101: Foods Your Guests Secretly Hate

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“Food is our common ground, a universal experience” -James Beard

 

A funny and somewhat hackneyed adage as regards wedding food once said that the most dangerous food to eat is a wedding quote. However, from a couple’s standpoint, it is far more dangerous to serve wedding food to their guests which they would secretly hate but pretend to love anyhow. It is no question that it is your big day and the occasion is all about you and your husband-to-be tying the knot, but the wedding food is a pivotal aspect of a wedding. In fact, in some rare cases, it dictates the success or failure of a particular event.

Serve too little and your guests would go hungry, serve them too much and you are likely to foot an exorbitant bill but serving them something they do not like altogether would spell a disaster for everyone. Not only will you and your guests have to stomach down the food served, but your wedding will be known as one of those events whose food did not make much of an impression. With this in mind, it would be imperative for you to gloss over the catering services in Pasay and see the types of the menu they offer. Otherwise, it might be helpful if you knew which wedding food items do not score high in most wedding guests’ scorecards.

1.) Appetizers that are hard to eat

It is no question that most modern weddings would now incorporate gimmicky things into their wedding—even if that means having food that is rather quirky and a bit hard to eat. Your guests are already having a hard time mingling with the other guests during the cocktail hour, do no make it even harder for them by giving them appetizers that are incredibly hard to eat and would likely cause them to make a mess. Have straightforward nibbles during cocktail hour—one which your guests can eat with one hand and balance a drink in their other hand.

2.) Weird signature cocktails

More often than not, these cocktails were engineered specifically for your wedding and are given monikers that would combine yours and your spouse’s or something cute like “Something Blue”. However, while the sentiment may be romantic (though a tad bit cheesy) to you, more often than not these concoctions do not taste as great as their name suggests. If they are too sickeningly sweet or are bland and watery, your guests would much rather have beer and wine than something that stimulates their gag reflex.

3.) Rubbery Chicken

Serving chicken at your wedding is a hit or miss thing. More often than not, it is the mode of preparation that contributes to how the dish will be received. However, considering that chicken is prepared hours before it is going to be served to your guests, that tender and juicy chicken your guests should have tasted will have been transformed into a piece of chewy rubber. And as unfortunate as it sounds, no one finds dried-out chicken marsala and cordon bleu appetizing to eat at all.

4.) Vegetable Bundles

While healthy options are always welcome, limp and soggy vegetables are not. Sure, the presentation looks superb as most of these vegetables are wrapped like little presents, but they would hardly add anything to the meal. Apart from the tasteless option, it would only make it obvious that you had obviously seriously overlooked the sides department. If you want a much more satisfactory option, buttery mashed potatoes, ravioli and pasta are great choices.

5.) Gluten-Free Everything

Even if you and your groom are on a special diet, make your big day your biggest cheat day. After all, just because you are on a restrictive diet, it does not mean that you should subject your wedding guests to the same limitations as well. While serving vegetarian, vegan and gluten-free dishes are perfectly acceptable, overhauling the entire menu to make it all vegetarian, vegan or gluten-free is another story. Let your guests enjoy their meal and at least give them options that they are likely to find acceptable.

 

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Filipino Weddings: Five Things to Expect and Guest Conduct

Brenda Chu and Alvin Raagas

“Marriage is three parts love and seven parts forgiveness of sins.” -Lao Tzu

It is a known fact that weddings are big festive events, but in the Philippines, it is all the more festive and grand. Considering that the family is an integral part of the Filipino culture, family members, relatives and even friends from abroad would all take leave and come home to celebrate this momentous event in an individual’s life. As it is a rare time for everyone to be home at the same time, celebrations do not last just a day, but in some cases, it would last a week to a month depending on how long visitors from abroad intend to stay.

Apart from looking for an appropriate wedding package in the Philippines, a lot of preparation goes into a Filipino wedding. While there are some more elaborate weddings elsewhere, what makes a Filipino wedding truly unique is the emphasis and importance it puts on the family. For this reason, most primary sponsors would be the couple’s godparents who apart from standing with them during the ceremony, are expected to give them sagely advice as regards marital and familial life. In any case, if you are attending a Filipino wedding, here are things you should expect or do:

1.) Give a timely RSVP

Invitations to a couple’s big day usually arrive weeks or months before the scheduled wedding date. Although in some cases, the physical form of a letter may arrive later than usual, you should do your part as a guest by sending your RSVP in a timely fashion. Remember that most couples would have to account for all of their guests through a final headcount. Giving the couple a prompt notice as to whether you will be attending or not would make it more convenient for them to decide on a final number of guests and a seating arrangement.

2.) Despedida de Soltera (Bachelorette Party)

Bachelorette parties in the Philippines are different (although, wild hen parties do still happen it all depends on the bride’s wishes). Filipino tradition dictates that a party would be held in favor of the bride to highlight her last few days as a single woman. While some bachelorette parties would involve raucous night out, this is also an event that would serve as a formal introduction to both sides of the family before the couple is officially wedded. So, if you have been given the honor of being part of the couple’s wedding entourage, do take part and contribute whatever you can to make this event more memorable.

3.) Take note of the maid of honor duties

If you have been given the prestige and honor of being a bride’s maid of honor, know that it is not an easy task. You are primarily chosen because the bride regards you as her closest confidante and trusts you to carry out your duties well. Apart from putting a bachelorette party together, your task would also include to organize the entourage for the wedding ceremony and attend to the bride’s needs. Additionally, it is also your duty to welcome and assist guests during the wedding reception.

4.) Follow the dress code given

While you can wear formal suits to weddings, if you want a more patriotic approach and something that would indeed appeal to Filipino tradition, you can do so by wearing the Filipino costume known as the Barong Tagalog. Dress codes are almost always indicated in the invitation–in any case, whatever you choose to wear for the wedding, always respect the couple’s wishes as to what kind of garb you should wear. This is the least you can do for their wedding day as an invited guest.

5.) Participate in the wedding games

Traditionally, Filipino wedding receptions would have intervals wherein games directed at married and single individuals are held. If you are a guest, do not dampen the couple’s spirits by refusing to partcipate—most especially if they call out your name. Have a great time and join the bouquet toss or garter toss if you are single. If you are married, enter some of the couple games with your spouse and just generally have fun.

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Tips on Being A Great Bridesmaid

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“A happy bridesmaid makes a happy bride” -Alfred Lord Tennyson

So, you have received the wedding invitation and have gotten the great honor of being a bridesmaid to the bride. You are ecstatic as well as excited for this big news. You and the bride have been friends for so long that playing the part of being part of her court as her bridesmaid should not prove to be incredibly difficult. Well, after all, you would only need to don on a beautiful gown, carry a bouquet of flowers and have a bright smile for the guests. Well, you do get to do that, but that makes up about a fraction of your bridesmaid duties. To be a great friend as well as an excellent bridesmaid, follow the various tips below and be the best support and bridesmaid a bride and a friend could ever ask.

1.) HELP WITH THE WEDDING SETUP

You might think that just because your friend has hired a top notch wedding coordinator and an army of caterers offering a party package, she would not need any more hands involved in her wedding. But before dismissing the idea of offering your help, try to ask the bride how you can help her. Do not wait until a week before the wedding and just offer your assistance whenever possible. Unknown to you, she might need help or even a friendly advice as to the seating arrangement of her guests, or might even ask you to throw a bachelorette party.

2.) DO NOT COMPLAIN ABOUT THE DRESS

Remember that this is her big day and not yours. So, even if you find the dress absolutely horrid and you dislike it to bits, do not complain about it. Remember, when you agreed to be her bridesmaid, you have another mandatory duty of wearing the dress, and technically, when you accepted her invitation to be a bridesmaid, it is implied that you agree to wear the dress. Do not throw a fit as regards the dress and keep in mind that the bride already has a lot of things to worry about without you adding to her stress.

3.) DO NOT GET WASTED

You might have your eye on one of the wedding guests or maybe one of the groomsmen, so naturally, you would want to let loose. You can drink in moderation but never to inebriation. Stay classy and do not be the bridesmaid and wedding guest who drank herself to stupor (not only on the wedding day but the bachelorette party as well). Take note of the fact that bride chose you to be her bridesmaid because she wants you to be there should she need anything and you are hardly any use if you get wasted. Additionally, your behavior will reflect on the bride and if anything, you should not embarrass her.

4.) RESPECT THE BRIDE’S DECISIONS

If there is an aspect of the wedding which you do not wholeheartedly agree with, but the bride is enthusiastic about, bite your tongue and respect her wishes. You may have written and prepared a speech you dreamed of saying on her wedding day, but she did not ask you to give one. Accept that and try not voice out your complaints. You may have difficulty in understanding her reasoning, but it is her big day, and it is her decision. However, if you feel strongly about one of her choices, let her know in a respectful and open-minded manner and do not try to change her mind once she has made her decision. You would not want to cause unnecessary pre-wedding drama.

5.) BE A LISTENER

Sometimes, all the bride would need is a good listening ear. She could be under a lot of stress from all the wedding planning and would need to rant and vent for a while. Be that listening ear to her and offer your moral support. More often than not, that is all the bride would need. Continuously ask yourself how you could make the experience even better for the bride, and she will greatly thank you and appreciate your efforts.

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