Wedding Planning: Four Things Your Wedding Planner Does Not Want You to Know

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“Weddings are not about spending the least amount of money or the most amount of money; they are about spending good money on the elements that are most important to you and your partner.”-Kristi Richardson

Wedding planning is, no doubt, a process littered with tricky situations and peppered with crucial decision-making scenarios. Indeed, the logistics are never quite straightforward nor are they always the same. To be successful in this endeavor, many brides-to-be would elect to seek professional help in the form of wedding planners. Wedding planners, for their part, have a particular expertise and flair in pulling weddings together. In this regard, they can be considered somewhat of a pro in planning weddings and are incredibly helpful in planning out the nitty-gritty details of a wedding. As a result, the bride can breathe and relax on her big day and would not be more stressed and anxious than she already is.

Choosing a talented and skillful wedding planner is not easy, and it is best to approach this attempt with your eyes wide open. While some wedding planners opt to be as transparent as they can be with their clients, there are less scrupulous planners who would rather keep essential details from you. In any case, here are some things that your wedding planner would not want you to know to determine whether what they kept from you is for your own good or for their bank book.

1.) Something will go wrong

With so many elements and aspects involved in a wedding, it is virtually impossible to pull it off flawlessly. In this regard, it would be inevitable that something would not go according to plan—no matter how meticulously you have planned their entire thing and regardless of how adept your planner might be. However, not all snags are major, and you can hope that it would be something insignificant such as the groom’s tie or something negligible. Similarly, you should also put into mind that there are no perfect weddings, just beautiful ones.

2.) Some of the vendors are probably her chums

Established wedding planners would already have a list of vendors they prefer to work with. If you wish to work with other vendors, it is best to stipulate this before you sign any contract. By choosing your own vendors, you can often get a better deal and quality—you would just need to do a little research and price comparison first. Seasoned and established planners would refer esteemed vendors—after all, a planner’s reputation would also be on the line. However, some planners might refer less qualified vendors who are still trying to build their reputations in the industry. With this in mind, it is best to consider a wedding planner who encourages you to keep your options open.

3.) They might not be as qualified as you think

Majority of wedding planners are already experienced in the field and have already developed an expertise in handling weddings. However, there are also handfuls few who are still trying to break ground in the industry. With this in consideration, how do you determine which one is which? After all, becoming a wedding planner does not require a license nor are any permits necessary. In this regard, it is best for brides to check with multiple references and review their past work samples. After all, some unsavory wedding planners are known for inflating their qualifications just to be hired.

4.) You can probably do it on your own

Some brides already possess the talent and flair for planning a wedding. In fact, it might be a second calling of all sorts and may even be considered as an avenue for showing off your budgeting skills and flawless taste. However, with stress and anxiety on top of the planning process, a bride may want to take a breather and let a wedding planner handle it all. But if you think you can pull it off on your own, you can save some cash and have a wedding that truly reflects who you and your husband are as a couple.

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Wedding Daze: Motivational Quotes to Keep You Going During Your Big Day

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“The real act of marriage takes place in the heart, not in the ballroom or church or synagogue. It is a choice you make—not just on your wedding day, but over and over again—and that choice is reflected in the way you treat your husband or wife. –Barbara De Angelis

Without a doubt, planning a wedding can be an incredibly exhausting experience. There are just so many aspects, and elements consider that more often than not, the logistics of holding a successful one would be blurred. In fact, you might feel the excitement building up months, weeks and even days to your wedding—only to be stifled by the amount of stress and anxiety you are going through. Not to fret, however, experiencing a reasonable amount of stress and anxiety is normal—recommended even, so long as you can keep a good handle on it. After all, your wedding day may be the most pivotal moment in your life, and in this regard, you and your spouse would be the center of attention for the entire duration of the day. Considering that most eyes will be on you on top of the pre-wedding stress you will inevitably encounter, it is understandable to feel a bit shy and uneasy.

To ensure you keep on going through your day, here are some of the best motivational wedding quotes as regards love, unions, and marriages. Read them before you make your way down the aisle to give you that much-needed confidence-boost.

1.) On uncertainty

“Love is the master key that opens the gates of happiness, of hatred, of jealousy, and most easily of all, the gate of fear.”-Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.

2.) On falling in love

“There is a big difference between falling in love with someone and getting married. Usually, after you get married, you fall in love with the person more.”-Dave Grohl

3.) On loving your spouse

“To love someone deeply gives you strength. Being loved by someone deeply gives you courage.”-Chinese Philosopher, Lao Tsu

4.) On commitment

“There is a higher form of happiness in commitment. I am counting on it.”-Claire Forlani

5.) On getting real with marriage

“In marriage, there are no manners to keep up and beneath the wildest accusations, no real criticism. Each is familiar with that ancient child in the other who may erupt again. We are not ridiculous to ourselves. We are ageless. That is the luxury of the wedding ring.”-Enid Bagnold

6.) On happiness after marriage

“Happy marriages begin when we marry the ones we love, and they blossom when we love the ones we marry”-Tom Mullen

7.) On finding the ultimate happiness in marriage

“To find someone who will love you for no reason and to shower that person with reasons, that is the ultimate happiness.”-Robert Brault

8.) On possibilities

“Weddings are important because they celebrate life and possibility.”

9.) On being in love

“You know you are in love when you cannot fall asleep at night because the reality is finally better than your dreams.”-Dr. Seuss

10.) On getting real about love

“Love is a promise; love is a souvenir, once given never forgotten, never let it disappear.”-John Lennon

11.) On the effect of marriage

“Getting married for me, was the best thing I ever did. I was suddenly beset with an immense sense of release, that we have something more important than our separate selves, and that is the marriage. There is happiness that can come from working towards that.”-Nick Cave

12.) On who you should marry

“You do not marry someone you can live with—you marry the person who you cannot live without.”-Unknown

If ever you feel jittery and have qualms right before your wedding day, let these quotes serve as your beacons of enlightenment and allow them to give you that extra nudge of encouragement for your big day.

 

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Tying the Knot? Here are Five Ingenious Tips to Read Before Buying Your Wedding Gown

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“On her wedding day, a woman should be certain she has found a dress that makes her feel confident and above all else, beautiful.”-Carolina Herrera

On any wedding day, all eyes will be on the bride as she makes her graceful walk down the aisle. With this in mind, it is only appropriate that a bride-to-be should be most meticulous and particular about the type of gown she wears on her big day. After all, a wedding gown is not only a dress a bride wears on her wedding day and selecting one is more than just a fitting, it is a memory in the making. For most women, a wedding gown could be the single most important dress they would ever wear in their lives–one that transcends all other garments she has and would ever have. So, if you are ready to hit the bridal shop, here are some tips to keep in mind to ensure you choose the wedding gown that suits you best:

1.) Have a price in mind

We all have our ideal gowns in mind, but at times the gown we dreamed of walking down the aisle in can be out of our price range. If this is the case, do not waste your time browsing that rack or even entertain the thought of buying it outright. Remember, you are not only spending for your wedding gown on your big day but on other aspects as well. Keep in mind; a dress budget does not only entail the gown itself but the cost of alterations, taxes, veil, shoes, lingerie, and jewelry. So, keep a realistic price in mind and stick to that.

2.) Start Early

Look for a wedding gown or dress at least six to eight months prior to your wedding day. But if you tend to be indecisive or are a picky shopper then add a couple of months more to that. Take note: a custom gown takes longer to make than the ones you can find off the rack—especially when they are heavily embellished. So, choose while it is still early as if you put it off for too long, you would either end up with a limited selection or make a quick purchase you might regret later.

3.) Consider the Dress Code

If you are getting married in a church, there might be religious restrictions you have to follow on what kind of wedding gown or dress you can wear. Consider these attire guidelines and make sure that you adhere to them in selecting a gown. After all, you would not want too many alterations on your gown should it not be allowed or worse, be asked to cover up as you walk down the aisle.

4.) Know What You Like

Your wedding gown or dress should be a reflection of you and your preference. If you have no idea what you truly want in a gown, you can start by perusing wedding gowns on the web and find one whose style resonates your own. Similarly, you can also take cues from your venue, theme and season of the day you are getting married to narrow down your choices. Eliminate silhouettes and fabrics that would look out of place in a venue such as poufy and bulky gowns in beach affairs as an example.

5.) Bring Your Accessories

Before your wedding day, it would be ideal if you had a rough idea of how you are going to look like when you walk down the aisle. While saving the full impact as a surprise on the day itself is done by most brides, this does not mean you should dismiss trying on the gown with your accessories either. You may opt to wear the gown sans your full bridal makeup when you are still trying it on, but it would be a good idea to know how it would look with the rest of your bridal ensemble such as the veil, the shoes, and the appropriate undergarments.

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Weddings Sins That Will Make Your Lola Gasp

It’s 2017, and it seems we forgot our values and traditions of weddings. Millenials have embraced the liberated culture of the West and have forgotten local traditions that are unique to Filipino culture. Thus, you may be guilty of committing wedding sins even when you aren’t aware. 

Read on to find which of the forgotten traditions will save your Lola from the heartache even if you are getting married in Intramuros – Casa Manila style.

 

Placing The Groom’s Name Before the Bride in Invitations

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The bride and her parents’ name should be written first. They are the host and share a large portion of the expenses. 

Your Lola and titas will agree to this because they’ve been through it. They definitely understand the delegation of responsibilities. Therefore it is tradition to have hers before the groom’s and his parents’ name on the invitations.

Thank you letters should print the groom’s name and his family before the bride’s name to show their support and acceptance to the ceremony and its proceedings.

 

The Bride Coming Before the Groom

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Ladies come first, but this isn’t one of those times. It’s bad luck for the groom to arrive after the bride. This is a grave sin for both couples, so be wary on your big day. 

Coordinate with each party and find a way to communicate if your partner is on his or her way. Be mindful of the time during preparation. Oversee any hindrance that may come along the way, be it traffic jam, a car breaking down, weather changes, broken zipper, lost pair of shoe or worse, a lost wedding ring.

 

 

The Bride Wearing a Pearl Jewelry

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It’s not pearl but look at what happened to Ariel because of the necklace.

As much as possible, pearl fanatics are discouraged from donning their prized accessories. Pearls resemble teardrops, and it is said that wearing pearl accessories will bring you tears. Unfortunately, they aren’t tears of joy.

Avoid wearing a string of pearls or pearl earrings on your wedding day. Doing so will bring sorrow and tears to your married life. Spare yourself and your future family from despair by following the tradition. Don’t come running to abuela, we warned you.

Like all events, there’s proper etiquette for guests. This case, the proper decorum also stems from our culture and traditions. Read this in case you get invited to someone’s big day.

 

Giving Sharp Objects as Gifts

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Give appropriate gifts. Remember when she thought forks were used for combing hair?

It may be tempting to give a set of knives to your BFF chef getting hitched this weekend, but doing so will bring bad luck. 

Sharp objects like scissors and gardening tools are home essentials, but there are other home necessities like appliances, pieces of furniture and home décor that are better given as presents to the newlyweds. They will greatly appreciate the gesture even if it’s not in the registry.

Giving a set of knives is also creepy, don’t you think?

 

Dress Code

The bride should be the most beautiful woman on her day. The groom is the most handsome man in the room. Not you nor your date

A wedding is a formal event, so dress accordingly. Some weddings have a theme indicated on the invite. Hence, respect the couple’s wishes what attire should be worn.

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Avoid stealing the spotlight and earning an eyeful from the elders by wearing skimpy dresses. Opt for modest clothing options. Don’t wear revealing, skin-tight dresses or short-sleeved casual attire. Polish your black shoes and style your hair to look clean and presentable. The guests’ appearance reflects the bride’s or the groom’s personality and any undesirable traits will reflect negatively to the in-laws.

 

Party Pooping

A wedding is also a celebration – feast of life, love, and unity. Don’t be a spoil sport by refusing to partake in the games and festivities. You’ll be putting down the energy and the mood of the couple. The goal is to attract positive and boundless energy for them. Do not be the cause to negate them.

These are some of the customs and traditions that are not observed by couples during their matrimonial rites. Guests also have to look out for these practices and make sure they follow the practices when gracing the event with their presence. If you want a refresher on other practices that are a must, head on to Casa Manila Museum. It features the lifestyle of elite Filipinos, who were conscious of social etiquettes and graces. It’s great place be purified and instill the traditions in yourself. Lola will be so proud.

Weddings 101: Five Truths Your Wedding Planner Will Never Tell You

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“No matter what happens, if at the end of your wedding day, you are married to the person you love, then it was a roaring success” – Quote from Hannah and Mat

 

Planning a wedding is no easy feat. It requires the harmony of various elements and aspects that would most often need the assistance of a professional. As such, this is the reason why so many brides-to-be would avail of the professional services of a wedding planner as they would help the bride realize her dream wedding and make it come into a fruition. In the wedding industry alone, you would know which wedding planners are the best as they offer the best deals for the bride’s available budget. After all, in the wedding business, everything can be negotiable if the couple knows how to compromise. This along with honesty are two of the best qualities an excellent wedding planner can have. Unfortunately, you cannot always count on your wedding planner to be a hundred percent frank–after all, there are some things that are best left a secret. But do not fear, today is your lucky day as this article allows you to be privy to some of the things your wedding planner would not dream of telling you:

 

1.) Your wedding taste may be tacky.

The theme you have chosen, the gowns you have selected, the engraved invitations–these things may look magnificent to you, but to a wedding planner who has seen and planned innumerable weddings, yours may fall short or pale in comparison. However, your wedding planner is not likely to tell you this, no matter how tacky your tastes may be and no matter how bad the wedding package in the Philippines you chose is. After all, if you are paying them a premium to do their jobs, they could not care less if you draped the wedding venue with paper flowers.

2.) You need to stop telling people you are getting married.

While you may want to bask in the excitement and euphoria, this is t exactly the most economic way to get wedding vendors or other aspects essential to the wedding. If you want to save on the wedding cake cost, do not ask for a tiered wedding cake from your chosen baker. Instead, just ask for the quote of an ordinary tiered cake and you would be surprised at the significant difference at the pricing.

3.) Bridesmaids dresses can still be glamorous while being affordable

A beautiful gown and an affordable gown does not have to be mutually exclusive–that is if you know where to have your gowns get done or if you know where to buy them. Instead of having a seamstress furnish you with every single member of the entourage’s entire formal ensemble, why not try visiting the prom section of a store. You will find great deals just under a couple of a thousand pesos–especially on off seasons where prom is long over.

4.) I know better than you do

Sure, this might be your dream wedding and while you might play a crucial role when it comes to wedding planning, do not make the rookie mistake of thinking you know better than your wedding planner. This might be the biggest day of your life, but it just so happens that this is the 200th wedding your planner has prepared for. So, whenever your planner offers a suggestion or would tell you that some aspects might not work, pay heed as they are doing exactly what you are paying them for. If you insist, you may end up with some botched aspects in the wedding.

5.) We want to work with you—even if you turn out to be a complete nightmare.

Pre-wedding stress is real. Complement that with planning stress syndrome and you have a recipe for disaster which most of the brides-to-be succumb to during the last few months of wedding planning. The truth is, even if you become rather hard to deal and work with, your wedding planner would still want to work with you. After all, you have bestowed the highest honor of entrusting to them the most special day of your life. That has to count for something and they would make sure they can deliver.

 

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Filipino Weddings: Five Things to Expect and Guest Conduct

Brenda Chu and Alvin Raagas

“Marriage is three parts love and seven parts forgiveness of sins.” -Lao Tzu

It is a known fact that weddings are big festive events, but in the Philippines, it is all the more festive and grand. Considering that the family is an integral part of the Filipino culture, family members, relatives and even friends from abroad would all take leave and come home to celebrate this momentous event in an individual’s life. As it is a rare time for everyone to be home at the same time, celebrations do not last just a day, but in some cases, it would last a week to a month depending on how long visitors from abroad intend to stay.

Apart from looking for an appropriate wedding package in the Philippines, a lot of preparation goes into a Filipino wedding. While there are some more elaborate weddings elsewhere, what makes a Filipino wedding truly unique is the emphasis and importance it puts on the family. For this reason, most primary sponsors would be the couple’s godparents who apart from standing with them during the ceremony, are expected to give them sagely advice as regards marital and familial life. In any case, if you are attending a Filipino wedding, here are things you should expect or do:

1.) Give a timely RSVP

Invitations to a couple’s big day usually arrive weeks or months before the scheduled wedding date. Although in some cases, the physical form of a letter may arrive later than usual, you should do your part as a guest by sending your RSVP in a timely fashion. Remember that most couples would have to account for all of their guests through a final headcount. Giving the couple a prompt notice as to whether you will be attending or not would make it more convenient for them to decide on a final number of guests and a seating arrangement.

2.) Despedida de Soltera (Bachelorette Party)

Bachelorette parties in the Philippines are different (although, wild hen parties do still happen it all depends on the bride’s wishes). Filipino tradition dictates that a party would be held in favor of the bride to highlight her last few days as a single woman. While some bachelorette parties would involve raucous night out, this is also an event that would serve as a formal introduction to both sides of the family before the couple is officially wedded. So, if you have been given the honor of being part of the couple’s wedding entourage, do take part and contribute whatever you can to make this event more memorable.

3.) Take note of the maid of honor duties

If you have been given the prestige and honor of being a bride’s maid of honor, know that it is not an easy task. You are primarily chosen because the bride regards you as her closest confidante and trusts you to carry out your duties well. Apart from putting a bachelorette party together, your task would also include to organize the entourage for the wedding ceremony and attend to the bride’s needs. Additionally, it is also your duty to welcome and assist guests during the wedding reception.

4.) Follow the dress code given

While you can wear formal suits to weddings, if you want a more patriotic approach and something that would indeed appeal to Filipino tradition, you can do so by wearing the Filipino costume known as the Barong Tagalog. Dress codes are almost always indicated in the invitation–in any case, whatever you choose to wear for the wedding, always respect the couple’s wishes as to what kind of garb you should wear. This is the least you can do for their wedding day as an invited guest.

5.) Participate in the wedding games

Traditionally, Filipino wedding receptions would have intervals wherein games directed at married and single individuals are held. If you are a guest, do not dampen the couple’s spirits by refusing to partcipate—most especially if they call out your name. Have a great time and join the bouquet toss or garter toss if you are single. If you are married, enter some of the couple games with your spouse and just generally have fun.

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Pre-Wedding Blues: Top Three Causes of Wedding Jitters

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No matter how in love or sure you are about your future spouse, weeks or months before your wedding day, you may experience a bout of pre-wedding jitters that would render you jittery, anxious and at times, a nervous wreck. Not to worry, this is simply the case of pre-wedding stress getting to you—perhaps from meticulously planning the wedding menu down to the the strategic seating arrangement of your guests. However, you need to sit down and contemplate about your proposal or your upcoming marriage if you are suddenly having doubts about your future partner—ones that would not go away after days of trying to relax. If you are having persistent qualms about your wedding, perhaps reviewing what the top three reasons for pre-wedding jitters would help you identify what is causing your anxiety.

1.) The wedding day

Sometimes, the wedding day itself would cause you incredible stress and anxiety. This is especially true for rather large weddings wherein every single one’s family, friend and relative are invited. Having all the people you care about in one room can cause you to worry especially if there are divorced parents, step-parents and even estranged family members involved, the wedding day can particularly be stressful. In other cases, it could be that being the spotlight is what is causing the stress. However, in any case, and in all instances, you should get support for your wedding day as this is essential. A counselor or a wedding planner would help you create a plan for dealing with difficult family members.

2.) Becoming a “wife” or “husband”

More often than not, the marriage of our parents would give us the first real insight of what a marriage is like and sometimes, their marriages would serve as the blueprint of yours. If your parents went through a particularly rocky relationship or if you came from a broken home or a home filled with anger, shame, neglect and violence, intimacy is something you would rarely see. If this is the case, we entertain the fear that we will turn out to be just like them no matter how irrational that may be/ Take note that you are not your parents so you do not exactly have to mirror your blueprint. Similarly, you can also choose not to repeat the same mistakes they have done. In any case, just because your parents did not have a happy marriage does not mean that yours is also doomed from the get-go.

3.) The plan after I-do

Remember that an essential thing before proposing to your significant other or even agreeing to become man and wife is to know what your plans are after the wedding. Some of these would involve significant questions that would determine you would do as a couple after your respective “I do’s”. These questions include if you want kids, where you should live, how much money you plan to make, how to budget, what kind of ambitions you would both have—and other questions of a similar tone. When you have talked about this with your partner, then well and good as you would at least know what your plans would be after the wedding and are least likely to stumble into a complication or come across a problem. However, if this is something you and your partner have barely discussed or never even talked about your problem then it would be understandable why you have wedding jitters that may even be particularly overwhelming.
Some couples think that these are the things they can work out after marriage and everything would fall into place right after.

However, a wedding is a major milestone in life and should you find that you and your partner are not on the same page as regards some aspects of marital life, you will end up having a lot of conflicts and arguments in the future. Before joining the nuptial club, consider having a one on one talk with your partner or find a couples counselor who would guide you both through discussions that would assist you create goals for yourselves and negotiate when your needs and desires differ.

 

 

 

Although it is normal to be wary about lasting decisions in life (such as choosing a life partner), the same cannot be said about persistent anxiety and worries about the state of your relationship and your marriage after you both have said I do. To know the root cause of you nuptial jitters, it would be wise to identify what is causing your stress to distinguish if what you are experiencing is a simple case of pre-wedding anxiety or something even more—and worth talking about with your fiance or fiancee.

 

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