Joyful Weddings: Five Things You Should Never Include in Your Wedding Toast

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“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person”-Mignon Mclaughlin

 

One of the best things about attending a wedding reception is getting to hear various wedding guests—especially those closest to the couple—regale the hall with tales and anecdotes of the couple’s adventures (or even misadventures). At times, a lot of pressure is put on the wedding speech giver to ensure that what he or she will deliver would not only be perfect but memorable and a fun one as well.

However, remember that for the most part, the wedding speech you are giving is mostly for the couple and would only serve as entertainment to those listening in. In that regard, you would not want to include personal matters that only you and the couple are privy to in your speech. While you might want to entertain the wedding guests, you would also not want to disclose stories that are either too personal or embarrassing for the couple. Keep it light, fun and entertaining without being over the top. Remember, there is a variety of ways to keep your speech from being boring without resorting to spilling the sordid details of what your friend did way back in college. More importantly, it is imperative to keep in mind that with a captive audience of both the bride and groom’s family and friends, what you leave out of your speech or toast is just as important as what you put in. So, what should be left out then? Here are some of the things that should never be included in wedding toasts and speeches for comedic effect or whatever reason:

 

Your errant misadventures with your friend

Regardless of how small, funny or insignificant an infraction might be it should never make it into a wedding speech when it involves getting in trouble with the law. Sure, you and your friend might have found the time wherein you got busted for underage drinking funny but your friend certainly would not appreciate you sharing that fact to all of his or her friends and relatives. Reminiscing about old times might bring in the nostalgia but it is inappropriate to share with someone’s in-laws, colleagues and grandparents in the room. Save those stories for bachelor and bachelorette parties but for your wedding toast or speech, offer a fond memory that speaks highly of the couple’s characters.

 

Bringing up any trouble in paradise

If you happen to be privy about the couple’s private lives such as knowing whether or not the family approves of him or that one time they fought about their finances, know that they made you a confidante for a reason. With that said, your wedding toast is definitely not the best place to bring that up—even if the couple did manage to reconcile or patch things up. Leave any mention of internal family drama or conflict out of your toast as you might potentially spell trouble for them.

 

Any of the couple’s exes

A wedding is neither the time nor the place to bring up any of the couples’ exes. Remember, the wedding is about the couple who just tied the knot and are about to start a future together. In this regard, you should not bring up anything—or anyone for that matter—from their pasts as it would only succeed in making them feel uncomfortable. More importantly, it would be sure to make their wedding guests ill at ease as well. In lieu of bringing up their exes, regale the audience with a story of how the couple met instead.

 

What transpired in the respective bachelor and bachelorette parties

Your wedding toast is not an avenue for you to expose your friend’s shenanigans and wild side. Keep in mind that what happens on the respective parties should only stay there. Remind yourself of why you and your friend have been with each other for the longest time and have had each other’s backs through the good times and the bad. Do not include any unflattering stories about your friend or the couple in your toast and instead, use it as an opportunity to tell the audience what you love about the couple and why you value their friendship.

 

An inside joke

An inside joke is called an inside joke for a reason. In this regard, it should only stay between you and your friend. Remember, you want everyone to be able to relate to your speech about the couple. So, if you recall a time that only you and your friend would know about, you will undoubtedly have some of the audience members scratching their heads. As a result, the audience will feel left out and no one would understand why your story is actually funny. Remember, the guests want to know more about the couple and their relationship. So, try to steer your focus towards that instead of regaling them with inside joke only you would probably find funny.

 

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Big Days and Big Moments: The Top Five Things a Bride Forgets Before her Big Day

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“Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other but in looking outward together in the same direction” –Antoine De Saint Exupery

No doubt, a bride’s wedding day would probably be the most significant day in her life she would look forward to.

In this regard, preparations would be made to ensure that everything goes up to speed and meticulous attention is given to every detail leading up to the event. However, as a bride is usually overwhelmed by the sheer enormity of the event and the inundation of things to consider, they are bound to forget a myriad of things on the day of their wedding itself. It does not matter how organized a bride thinks she is, how organized they seem or how many spreadsheets they have prepared, they would inevitably forget a thing or two during the big day. After all, the couple of weeks leading up to your wedding are the most crucial and there will be a minefield of easily forgotten details. Sure, you have penned the details of the wedding ceremony down to the last detail and have hired a professional to take care of the various aspects in your wedding but oftentimes, what you forget are easily the most commonly overlooked things you should do the day before your wedding. To address this, it is best to add what these commonly neglected wedding tasks are and add them to your checklist so that come wedding day, you are as prepared as you can be.

Here are some of the most commonly forgotten wedding tasks a bride neglects to do the night or days before her big day:

 

Give your sparkler a shine

Of course, by the time you put the wedding ring on your finger, you would be showing it off far more than your engagement ring. However, as they will be located in the same finger, it would be worth your while to have your engagement ring cleaned and shined a day or two before your big day. Let it sparkle and take the center stage as well. After all, it would probably be featured in a myriad of shots in your SDE videos and photos.

 

Prepare your touch up bag

While your professional makeup artist would be there to take care of your make up and touch ups throughout the day, there are moments wherein they might not be able to attend to you right away. In this regard, it is imperative to have your own touch up bag and prepare it in advance. Have your handy compact powder, mirror and lipstick with you and pack all the basic essentials you would need to keep yourself looking fresh all day.

 

Get your bridal party gifts together

Modern weddings today traditionally include bridal party gifts which the bride would present to her bridal party or squad as a way of saying thank you. You can get these ready days leading up to the wedding and have it ready the morning of the big day. If you have gone out of your way of choosing something personal and special for each of them, be sure not to forget the gifts.

 

Prepare a playlist

On the morning of your wedding day when you and your bridal squad are getting ready, it would be best to have a list of jams which you could then play. After all, no morning getting-ready session would be complete without your favorite tunes and tracks and of course, a few glasses of your favorite drinks. You can ask one of your bridesmaids to do this. Have them compile a fun playlist that would keep everyone in the mood as they await their turn for hair and makeup.

 

Prepare comfy shoes

While it might seem like an extra thing to pack, you will never regret bringing along some comfy flat shoes for you to wear in case your feet get sore. Sure, you might have convinced yourself that you can strut the night away in your gorgeous wedding heels, but once you have had way too many to drink and would wish to dance, you will be glad you do not have to walk around barefoot in your wedding dress. At some point during the night, you might wish to take your heels off, so a pair of comfy sandals, slippers or shoes will surely save the day.

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4 Signs You Shouldn’t Be in A Wedding

Other people enjoy weddings. They marvel at the magic of the wedding vows and the solemnity of the affair. The feminine touches of the decorations and the well-coordinated theme are something that people look forward to seeing.

Unfortunately, not all people have a romantic bone in their body. These are the people who secretly hate other people just because they exist. They are not exactly the life of the party. But they are going to the wedding because of their love for the couple.

If you find yourself connecting to five of these signs, then you definitely shouldn’t be at a wedding.

  1. You judge everyone’s clothes.

It’s human nature to judge and comment on other’s people attire and sense of fashion. But if you’re endlessly doing it to entertain and keep yourself from sleeping, then you shouldn’t be there in the first place. The long speeches absolutely bore you to death. The corny jokes also make you wish the ground would swallow you alive.

  1. You would rather spend the day at the mall.

There are so many things you would rather do than witness the “first” kiss of the couple. You prefer to walk around the mall at Vertis North. You feel happier spending your hard-earned cash shopping for new clothes than wearing a drabby suit or ugly wedding dress. Heck, you would prefer snuggling with your furry friend rather than giving air kisses to the people that aren’t even your friends.

  1. You aren’t a fan of people, dancing, and well-wishes.

Just thinking of the people you have to meet annoys you especially if it’s your job to greet and usher them to their seats. It doesn’t help when there are rude guests or people with an attitude are difficult to handle. Then, there’s the dancing you need to prepare. People will call you a party pooper when you’re the only person seated once the DJ starts playing the tunes.

Most of all, there are speeches and well-wishes. Mothers, bridesmaids and a bunch of highly-sensitive people start to cry during the wedding vows and the long speeches. People need to chill out. It’s justs words.

  1. You hate photo ops.

Besides the shots from the official photographer, there are groufies and selfies to take. Isn’t one photo enough? Your face is aching from all the smiling and laughing. Moreover, your feet are tired. Some of your muscles are aching from bending so the camera can get a better angle. Lastly, you need to put makeup or fix your hair so you won’t look out of place.

  1. You always go for seconds, or you go to a drive-thru to get your fill.

Attending a wedding means free food, but that doesn’t mean you can get a full tank. Since the couple has to budget and make sure everyone gets their fill, the meals are controlled. They can be plated for you, or some servers will place the food on your plate. Besides the small portions, the menu may be composed of food unfamiliar to you or aren’t your cup of tea. Hence, you end up ordering a fast food meal right after the party.

Even without these signs, you would rather let the occasion pass than sit and watch the spectacle. You would rather sit one out for the team than be in front of the action. But after all these things, you would still be around to support a family member, friend and loved one on their special day.

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Weddings Sins That Will Make Your Lola Gasp

It’s 2017, and it seems we forgot our values and traditions of weddings. Millenials have embraced the liberated culture of the West and have forgotten local traditions that are unique to Filipino culture. Thus, you may be guilty of committing wedding sins even when you aren’t aware. 

Read on to find which of the forgotten traditions will save your Lola from the heartache even if you are getting married in Intramuros – Casa Manila style.

 

Placing The Groom’s Name Before the Bride in Invitations

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The bride and her parents’ name should be written first. They are the host and share a large portion of the expenses. 

Your Lola and titas will agree to this because they’ve been through it. They definitely understand the delegation of responsibilities. Therefore it is tradition to have hers before the groom’s and his parents’ name on the invitations.

Thank you letters should print the groom’s name and his family before the bride’s name to show their support and acceptance to the ceremony and its proceedings.

 

The Bride Coming Before the Groom

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Ladies come first, but this isn’t one of those times. It’s bad luck for the groom to arrive after the bride. This is a grave sin for both couples, so be wary on your big day. 

Coordinate with each party and find a way to communicate if your partner is on his or her way. Be mindful of the time during preparation. Oversee any hindrance that may come along the way, be it traffic jam, a car breaking down, weather changes, broken zipper, lost pair of shoe or worse, a lost wedding ring.

 

 

The Bride Wearing a Pearl Jewelry

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It’s not pearl but look at what happened to Ariel because of the necklace.

As much as possible, pearl fanatics are discouraged from donning their prized accessories. Pearls resemble teardrops, and it is said that wearing pearl accessories will bring you tears. Unfortunately, they aren’t tears of joy.

Avoid wearing a string of pearls or pearl earrings on your wedding day. Doing so will bring sorrow and tears to your married life. Spare yourself and your future family from despair by following the tradition. Don’t come running to abuela, we warned you.

Like all events, there’s proper etiquette for guests. This case, the proper decorum also stems from our culture and traditions. Read this in case you get invited to someone’s big day.

 

Giving Sharp Objects as Gifts

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Give appropriate gifts. Remember when she thought forks were used for combing hair?

It may be tempting to give a set of knives to your BFF chef getting hitched this weekend, but doing so will bring bad luck. 

Sharp objects like scissors and gardening tools are home essentials, but there are other home necessities like appliances, pieces of furniture and home décor that are better given as presents to the newlyweds. They will greatly appreciate the gesture even if it’s not in the registry.

Giving a set of knives is also creepy, don’t you think?

 

Dress Code

The bride should be the most beautiful woman on her day. The groom is the most handsome man in the room. Not you nor your date

A wedding is a formal event, so dress accordingly. Some weddings have a theme indicated on the invite. Hence, respect the couple’s wishes what attire should be worn.

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Avoid stealing the spotlight and earning an eyeful from the elders by wearing skimpy dresses. Opt for modest clothing options. Don’t wear revealing, skin-tight dresses or short-sleeved casual attire. Polish your black shoes and style your hair to look clean and presentable. The guests’ appearance reflects the bride’s or the groom’s personality and any undesirable traits will reflect negatively to the in-laws.

 

Party Pooping

A wedding is also a celebration – feast of life, love, and unity. Don’t be a spoil sport by refusing to partake in the games and festivities. You’ll be putting down the energy and the mood of the couple. The goal is to attract positive and boundless energy for them. Do not be the cause to negate them.

These are some of the customs and traditions that are not observed by couples during their matrimonial rites. Guests also have to look out for these practices and make sure they follow the practices when gracing the event with their presence. If you want a refresher on other practices that are a must, head on to Casa Manila Museum. It features the lifestyle of elite Filipinos, who were conscious of social etiquettes and graces. It’s great place be purified and instill the traditions in yourself. Lola will be so proud.

Wedding Guest Etiquette: The Five Do’s of being a Wedding Guest

You have received the invitation and it tells you the save a particular date. You are quite excited about the prospect of being all dolled up for this occasion and could not help but feel a little giddy as you are certain you are to be stringing along your date. In your anticipation about the prospect of being surrounded in well-dressed guests and your excitement in frolicking about in the bar sipping on cocktails while perusing the fashion choice of the bride, you neglect to RSVP to the wedding invitation.

With that alone you have committed and are about to commit quite a number of wedding guest faux pas. The wedding day might be all about the bride and her big day, but that does not necessarily connote that all proper means of demeanor, conduct and etiquette are centered on her. As a guest, there is a certain set of rules that you should abide by should you want to bride and groom feel at ease that they have invited you to commemorate their happiest day.

Some rules are pretty straightforward and are pretty much expected of a wedding guest (do not get embarrassingly inebriated, do not ask the couple for any favors, etc.) but there are some rules that are often overlooked and disregarded. This article shall be your purveyor to the wedding guest DO’s, so that come wedding day, you will be a stellar guest of the affianced couple.

DO’s

1.)    RSVP

Pretty straightforward but very much overlooked. There is a reason why guests need to RSVP before the wedding this is so the couple can estimate how much the wedding catering would cost. Much planning goes into how many people the couple will invite and they will be paying for every single guest attending which means, that if you could not attend their wedding, it is best to tell them you cannot so they can allocate the spot saved for you to someone else. Guests that RSVP months prior the wedding is a boon to the couple’s guesting preferences as it shows that they have enough courtesy to respond when invited. Invited guests that do not RSVP and fail to show up, however, are in bad taste.

2.)    DRESS ACCORDINGLY

Some invitations would explicitly state how their guests should be attired for the ceremony, however, there are also invitations that would make a subtle insinuation as to how their guests should be dressed (seashells and sand on the invitation suggests a casual ceremony whereas an embossed and embroidered one would mean a formal affair). The wedding reception may also be a great indication as to how a guest should be garbed (Ballrooms and function rooms require formal attires while garden weddings can be considered casual)

If you are still unsure how you should be clothed for the wedding, ask someone who is familiar to the wedding preparations such as the wedding coordinators or a member of the couple’s family.

3.)    DO SHOW UP TO THE CEREMONY

Some guests would skip the ceremony altogether and just show up to the reception. This is a big wedding guest faux pas as the ceremony is the most important part of the affair and the couple obviously wanted you to be a witness to their exchange of vows. Neglecting to show up to the ceremony and going straight to the reception would be doing the couple not only a discourtesy but a disservice as well. Be a considerate guest by being present in the ceremony and the reception as well.

4.)    DO SIT AT YOUR ASSIGNED TABLE

Do not make a fuss as to where you are seated. This has all been strategically planned by the bridge and groom as well as the coordinators. Generally, you would be seated with your family if you are coming as a bunch, otherwise, if you came alone then the couple might have you seated next to a stranger they want you to get acquainted with. Do not begrudge them this, smile, mingle and make friends.

5.)    DO BRING A GIFT

It is the least you can do to tell the couple that you were happy to have been invited to witness their wedding. Besides, if the bride and groom have obviously spent for you to be there, would it not be nice to reciprocate the gesture by giving them a simple token they can use for their life as a couple?

Though we have extensively discussed all that you should do as a wedding guest, there are also a certain number of don’ts that you should be aware of should you want to conduct yourself appropriately as a wedding guest which will be thoroughly discussed in another article. For now, this is the set of do’s you can acquaint yourself with as a wedding guest to make yourself worthy of that wedding invitation.